Every Time I Return

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Photo by Julia Raasch on Unsplash

I think you’re probably familiar with the verse below.

Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. (Matthew 6.33 NLT)

This world is empty. This world is full. It’s a paradox. As a Christian I’m one who strives to die to myself, but my sin is great. I return evil for evil too many times to count. The blood of Christ is indeed an undeserved gift I’ve done nothing for. I can do nothing for it. It was freely given to me, and my LORD’s resurrection assures me that death is anything but the end.

The Holy Spirit guides me in this world of empty and full as I traverse each day in light and darkness. I am both and because as a sinner I want to sin less. I cannot expect not to sin. Are there times I could have sinned, but I didn’t? There are those times. There are those times, however, when temptation presented itself, and I gave into it. Those are sadly sinful moments I try to repent (change) from.

My pastor has been talking a lot about fasting and prayer. We’ve been in the prophets in the Old Testament, so fasting and prayer would be an obvious topic in that biblical genre. Seeking my LORD and my God has been a way of life for me from birth. My dad and mom have been leaders in church since before the day of my birth. They have surrounded me with people who have called upon the name of Jesus their entire lives. As I’ve written before I now call upon Jesus Christ from my own experience as I see the validity he is for the pain I face. My relationship with him is the most important relationship I have.

I’ve fallen away from being near him not because he went away, but because the distractions of this world drag me away from him.

He longs for my surrender to him because not only has he conquered the world, but he has mastered death. There is literally nothing I have to fear when he is near. I no longer have to hide in shame. His assurance enables me to be seen and heard, and when someone needs me to listen he gives me the strength to be for them what he empowers me to be for them.

Life can drain us of all energy because Satan is only in the business of taking. He lies to us in the vein that what we desire we have to have, but when we remember he is the father of lies we must be willing to change again to seek God first.

And this doesn’t just happen when we become Christians. It happens over and over throughout life.

He’s patient is he not? He longs for all to come to know him. If he sighs in frustration I’d imagine he’d do just that when my mind does not rest in his presence. He is peace. He is love. He is joy and happiness, and just being with him touches our central nervous system to calm everything inside our bodies.

He heals. He corrects. He gives us hope. He knows all things about us, but he never forces himself on us. He comes running from great distances when he sees we are returning. He embraces us and throws a party because his child is home. And he doesn’t just do this once.

He does it every time we seek him.

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